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Episode 114: Life as a Single Foster Mom

By February 22, 2021January 3rd, 2023Podcast

Today’s guest truly is an inspiration. Dani Brewer is a full-time wedding and family photographer, a single foster parent, as well as a transracial adoptee. She shares about how God prompted her to step in to foster care even though she didn’t feel ready and she shares honestly about how she’s been able to effectively care for a now-16-month-old and 4-month-old as a single mom, the barriers she’s overcome, and the irreplaceable value of strong community. Her spirit is so encouraging, and I look forward to hearing what stands out to you in this conversation!


1. You’re never going to feel “ready” to step in and foster.

Dani had set some benchmarks in her mind of things she had to accomplish before she could become a foster parent, such as getting married. God prompted her one day during a sermon to ask, “What are you waiting for?” Dani says, “We can get paralyzed in the fear of the unknown, and I just didn’t want to do that anymore.”

When it comes to hard things, we have to simply step out in faith, and trust that God has gone before us. There will always be questions, unknowns, and fears, but if we wait for those things to go away before we say yes, the waiting will never stop.

“It is just as hard as everyone talks about, but it’s one of those things that you can’t completely understand until you’re in it.”

2. We have to be aware of our own well-being in the midst of the foster care journey.

Dani so honestly shares how walking through this side of the foster care system as an adult adoptee has been emotionally triggering as she’s also fusing together the pieces of her own story. She’s navigated this through counseling and reintroducing self-care routines, but most importantly she has strived to be aware of what is going on inside her. Whether it’s emotional triggers, overwhelm, or spiritual disconnection, it’s important for each of us to check-in on our well-being as we walk out our foster care journey.

“I have to seek Christ first to be able to parent them better.”

3. “Ask for help and be specific.”

Dani’s wisdom here is spot-on. It’s often difficult for foster parents to be willing to ask for help, but so many people want to step in and support, but simply aren’t sure where to start. Don’t be afraid to ask for a meal, for prayer, for someone to come help with bedtime, for someone to help clean (Dani actually has a friend come over to help with this once a week), or anything else. Developing a strong community is often the support you need to continue forward on the journey.

“I lean on my people so much because I really can’t do a fraction of what needs to be done on my own.”


We hope this episode has helped you wherever you are on your foster care journey. That’s the goal! If so, will you tell others?

Share this post or rate the podcast on Apple Podcasts (or wherever you listen) and leave us a brief review

Meet Our Guest

Dani Brewer is a full-time wedding and family photographer in Tennessee, a biracial Black transracial adoptee, and a single foster mom to two young children, “Sunny” and “Blaze.” She was a kinship placement with her now-parents when she was a baby before they eventually became her legal guardians. 

Foster Parents, check with your agency to see if listening to this podcast will count toward your foster care training hours!

Special thanks to Resonate Recordings for their knock-it-out-of-the-park podcast production services! If you have a podcast or want to start one, reach out to our friends at Resonate!

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