Trent Taylor’s earliest memories are filled with abuse and extreme neglect. These circumstances led to entering foster care at the age of four where he would remain until he was nine years old. After he was adopted, it was a long and painful process to establish trust and work through the trauma he had experienced, but he found that there was hope. In this episode, Trent shares some of the common misconceptions people have about foster children, how to support a child working through trauma, the reality that healing requires pain, and a look back on his own story and how God is using his life in some incredible ways.
HERE ARE 3 TAKEAWAYS FROM TODAY’S CONVERSATION:
1. Healing is possible, but you can’t force it.
Whether it’s with your own trauma or someone else’s, you can’t rush the process. Before healing can begin, trust has to be established with the person helping you. You may be able to see what needs to be healed, but you need to let the process happen, no matter how long that process may need to be.
“If your child is not ready to work through their trauma, it’s just not going to happen. You have to do it when they are ready. You can’t ever force it.”
2. You have to go through the pain to experience hope and healing.
Unfortunately, there is no pain-free way to process trauma. The good news is that it is worth it! The journey towards healing includes processing the painful feelings you’re experiencing. It includes talking about it. Processing your trauma is not a guarantee that you will never feel the pain again, but it is the only way to move on and not let it define the rest of your life.
“The pain, unfortunately, never goes away. It’s always going to hurt. It’s just a matter of how much it hurts and how much power you let it have.”
3. The value of listening without judgment can’t be overstated.
Trent eventually had adults enter his life who were able to look past behavior issues, really see him, and listen to his heart. This opened up an avenue for communication about his experience, the hope available in Jesus, and eventually a path towards healing.
“Our brains were not meant to handle that kind of trauma and that kind of pain; we are not designed to handle that kind of stuff.”
4. Seek support from others.
We cannot do this alone. Whether you are a foster parent, adoptive parent, foster child, or an individual with trauma, we need the support of an understanding community. Without that support, we can feel alone, like there is no hope, and ultimately we will likely give up. Actively search for those people that are going to walk with you through every hardship and be there to cheer you on.
“Without that support and without people to wrap around you, it is going to be very difficult. It’s very easy to feel isolated. It’s very easy to burn out.”
Meet Our Guest
Trent Taylor experienced sexual abuse, neglect, and domestic violence during the first half of his childhood. He was in the foster care system beginning at age four until the age of nine when he was adopted. Today, Trent is a 20-year-old who devoted his life to helping others overcome trauma by providing hope and healing by sharing his own story of triumph. He has mentored hundreds of children who have experienced trauma through the Mercy for America’s Children Kids Division he founded in 2013. He co-hosts a podcast with his adoptive mom, Pam, which strives to break misconceptions about children who have spent time in foster care. Trent is the Co-Founder and CEO for Watch Me Rise, a ministry devoted to working on behalf of children who have experienced trauma.
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