Letting Go When You’re Attached

By October 15, 2020Blog

I suppose there is this moment in every parent’s journey. We know it’s coming at the start.

The number of days that your child will grow within the walls of your home is limited.

There will be a time of release, a time where your child ventures out into the world in a way that they haven’t before.

Your role as a parent will shift and change.

As foster parents, for us, that’s coming after 510 days instead of 6570. It’s coming at age 4 and 5 instead of 18 or 20.

We didn’t get the other 6000 days in the role of parent.

And that is indeed what we signed up for. And there is joy in knowing that our limited time means that a mom is reuniting with her girls.

Her time with her girls is precious too. One day, she, too, will be working through that release.

For now, that release is ours to navigate.

There is incredible sadness knowing that the time in our current role is drawing to a close.

There is no guarantee of what’s to come next for us.

I don’t know if they will physically be part of our lives. I don’t know if they will call or reach out.

This is the next phase of the unknown in this journey of unknowns.

I’m left praying as I prepare to watch at a greater distance or maybe no proximity at all.

I’m praying that our girls would know that they are dearly loved.

I’m praying that they grow into women who know their value and worth as God has ascribed to them from their very creation.

I’m praying that they love Jesus and people fully, that they care for one another well.

I’m praying that they are equipped for the joys and trials they will face in their future, knowing that there is a God who is holding them through it all.

I’m praying that they run to God in prayer as they share their highest of highs and their lowest of lows with Him.

I’m praying that they chase their dreams and use the gifts that God has given them—whether that’s becoming a dentist, a ballerina, a super girl, or something new that sparks their heart.

I’m praying that they lean into God’s Word as they learn to read and that it would be the sweetest gift to them throughout their lives.

I’m praying that they find a community of encouragement at every stage of their lives, that they know they don’t have to walk through this life alone.

These prayers are not new, yet now, as we transition into a new stage, they hold a new kind of weight. They feel more urgent than ever.

As we prepare to release and let go, I’m reminded that the same God who has carried us these past 500+ days will continue to carry us in this next season, just as He will for them.

So, we’ll continue speaking truth over them, enjoying the big and small moments, reading both silly books and books that reveal more of God’s heart to them, and we’ll keep praying together in our few days left.

And when the time comes that we aren’t together, we’ll keep praying.

It has and will be a blessing to be part of their story.


If you’re walking this road too, can I recommend a children’s book to read with your kiddos before they go?

Get this one. It’s not foster care specific, but it has been so valuable to us as we talk about our greatest hopes for our girls with them.

Holly Gnuse

Holly grew up with a heart for adoption but didn’t know much about foster care. God used an internship with a local child welfare agency to make her aware. Coupling that experience with knowing the joy of the Gospel, Holly is passionate about connecting the local church to the foster care community. Holly and her husband, Scott, were married in December 2013 and are enjoying the crazy adventure of life together.

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